In physics, we use the term ‘lubricant’ to refer to any substance that helps reduce friction between surfaces in contact with each other. What we often forget is that our body too has a surface. Talking bodies, did you know that vaginas can naturally produce lubrication? This happens especially during arousal to make sexual play more comfortable, lessen the chances of irritation or chafing and limit the force of friction.
However, it’s not just about the vagina when it comes to sex, is it? The penis and anus like attention too, but they don’t have the same lubricating mechanism as a vulva/vagina. In fact, many vulva-owners themselves might experience dryness down there or would want a smoother experience. For all these reasons and more, people can make use of artificial or personal lubricants, to have a more fulfilling time while engaging in sexual activity.
What is Lube?
Lube (or, personal lubricant), is a liquid or gel that can be applied to the vulva, penis, or anus for a wetter and better sexual experience. The best part about a sexual lube is that it is pretty versatile, and can be used for:
- penis-in-vagina (PIV) penetration,
- oral sex,
- anal play,
- using sex toys,
- going solo and masturbating
Whether you’re with a partner or by yourself, lube can be the savior in disguise to help you reach that seventh heaven. Not only does a lubricant make any form of sex more pleasurable, but also helps many vulva and penis owners to have minimal discomfort and pain. Not sure where to start? Know all about what lube works best for you!
Types of Lubes
Good news—there is a variety in the types of lubricant gel or liquid that you can choose from. Let’s explore the basics.
- Water-based: Most flexible (covers all bases), fuss-free, and skin-friendly; best for use with both condoms since they avoid breakages, and/or sex toys — but may dry up quicker compared to other types. Not the best choice for your sex marathon, or water play/shower sex (as it will easily be washed off). What’s more, they feel close to home as they mimic your vaginal lubrication.
- Silicone-based: Lasts longer than water-based lube and is less sticky; even though it can be used with most condoms, it’s not the apt choice for sex toys or diaphragms made of silicone. Ideal for a longer sesh, anal sex and requires less reapplication.
- Oil-based: Great for sex involving skin-to-skin contact; however, unsafe to use with condoms (as the latex can break down leading to its ineffectiveness) or sex toys. Not to mention, post-sex clean-up becomes a hassle! But, they can be great for sensual massages.
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Best Lubricants
A million-dollar question, but is there really one ‘best’ lube? The simple answer is yes, and no! Depending on your needs, and what every brand and type has to offer, the best personal lube is the one that works for YOU.
When using a condom, you may opt for water-based lubes since they bode well with latex. Rule of thumb: avoid oil-based lubricants in this case at all costs! As a matter of fact, water-based lubes also work magically with sex toys and can be a great choice for essentially any activity you can think of. Except for when you are feeling adventurous and want to have fun with water. In that case, silicone-based is your best bet.
Speaking of water, while not all sexual lubricants are similar, the water-based ones get the prize for being the most flexible. They can be used in practically any activity you can think of, even ones involving silicone toys. Moreover, they feel the closest to natural vaginal lubrication and are a safe choice for first-timers!
So, are all water-based lubes well for my wetland?
Well, not exactly…Natural Lubricants
Your body is a wonderland, and rightly said so! While a lot of brands often include ingredients such as glycerine in water-based lubes, this can increase your chances of getting a yeast infection or an irritable coochie. Hence, the ingredients in your lubes are of utmost importance when choosing the right lube. And, what’s better than going all-natural?
How to Use Sex Lubricant
First things first, there is no one or right way to use lube. However, you can always keep a few things in mind while using your personal lubricant.
Solo Play
Just a few pumps of lube can go a long way in making your solo sesh a lot more fun and teleport you to that happy place. Icing to the cake is the supple and moisturized handEven for sex toys (especially silicone ones), water-based sex lubes can bring your A-game!
For vulva, just take 2-3 pumps onto your finger, hands, or palms (OR, howsoever much you need to lubricate and feel at ease, you do you). Gently rub in any motion you find comfortable and cover as much area as you’d like. Insert a finger or two to your liking, or toy around. Spread, slather and let it slide!
- For penis, start with a few pumps on your hand and fingers and rub it around your penis in any motion you like (be careful if you have foreskin) and once you’re content, keep moving baby! Throw in a toy or do it old-school, you deserve the best only!
Partnered Play
Whether you’re into penetration or not, using sexual lube can help make sex with your partner a relaxing and pleasurable experience. Applying a lubricant before or during penetrative sex can smoothen the process and be extra fun.
With condoms, water-based lubes can be applied on the outside after putting on the condom or using some amount inside the tip of the condom. Feel free to slather some on the penis before you roll the condom on for better play! Similarly, rub some lube around your sex toy for game-changing results.
The point being, when it comes to the ‘sex lubricant – how to use’ guide, there’s no specific amount. Be liberal while applying lube, and if need be, reapply and enjoy!